OPINION: Pride of Owning a House Knows No Bounds

Although my uncle’s house was nothing less than a big magnificent bungalow that sheltered me and my family through all our hard times, I, however, felt a desperate need for a home exclusively of our own.

Adfar Shah

I used to imagine its premises, color, look, design, furnishing, bedrooms, decorations, wall hangings, windows, curtains, and what not. Often a deep sigh would burst from my heart and I would utter in a grief-stricken mood, oh how I wish we had a home of our own in this city anywhere.

Back then life for us was difficult, fast, challenging and the cost of living so high that it was a big deal to own a house, but still, my parents worked day and night to fulfill our dream to own a house.

I too contributed by spending little money and helped them to reach their goal by working in call-centers during the night and continued with my studies during the day.

It used to be a brutal and embarrassing question when someone used to ask where my home was. With great courage I used to brand my uncle’s house as mine.

It was painful to live in a house without being able to modify it according to our own choice and style. We could not make any changes to the house because it was not our own. I often felt like a homeless person, even though I lived in a big mansion.

Finally the good times returned and we bought a small house in the city surroundings. This news came to me as if our country had gained independence. I rushed to the spot to see it for myself. My first glimpse of the house brought tears to my eyes, but they were tears of joy. I felt as if I was conferred with some kind of a prestigious award. Although the house was small, the feeling of it being my own made it big and beautiful.

I entered its premises barefoot and kissed its walls as if I had entered some holy shrine. After a few days, modifying and decorating ideas visited my mind, preferences and priorities got developed, new choices sprouted from within and I began to make alterations to it in various respects. I felt free to change or install anything in it. I began to decorate it with my favorite items which made me feel overjoyed and content.

Astonishingly, I felt no exhaustion despite hours of continuous work: be it sanitation or setting up things inside it. This was all due to the sweet feeling of it belonging to me and of being my own.

The foreheads of my parents were shining that day and they were looking at me confidently; perhaps quietly saying that they have done it for me.

On our first get-together on its premises, I realized that neither Switzerland nor Kashmir, but home, is the most beautiful place on earth.

I was extremely happy for achieving all that I had aspired for. A solace for all times to come, a reliable shelter, a sympathetic roof over my head, and an address for identity.

But above all, I was happy to have — a home sweet home.

About Adfar Shah

Syed Adfar Rashid Shah is a contributing writer and a doctoral candidate in the Department of Sociology. He can be reached via email at: [email protected]

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10 comments

  1. thank you dear,plz introduce yourself

  2. Beautifully executed the experience of life. It is a brilliant piece but shows disjunction and assumed experience, for instance ‘Finally the good times returned and we bought a small house in the city surroundings. This news came to me as if our country had gained independence. I rushed to the spot to see it for myself. My first glimpse of the house brought tears to my eyes, but they were tears of joy’. need to b prsented in a way would made it real in taste. Any this is really beautiful art of writng and experience.Welldone. Keer it up

  3. dear Fayaz sahab,
    THE disjunctions i believe appear due to the clash between creativity and technocracy.stories written by any one need to be treated very carefully while pasting on the paper.i also believe there must be least meddling with such themes by editors because as Gadamer argues,that reading a text involves entering into a kind of play between text and reader in which the text has an effect upon us and we an effect upon the text.He furhter says,we cannot explore the author’s interpretation in full because of his/her particular historical context.

  4. It’s a beautiful write-up, Adfar. I can relate to it. But I still gotta go a long way to get myself that ‘solace for all times’. Love the lines- “A solace for all times to come, a reliable shelter, a sympathetic roof over my head, and an address for identity.” :)

    And I am sure it’s been a long time since you got your own house but still, ‘Congratulations!’

  5. thankx Nithya,i too liked very much your Democracy vs Democracy.it made a good read.regarding home,there goes a by word in kashmiri:
    Gharehh wandhyy Gharehh saasah bareh nerhyy neh zenh
    chattith aasyy kruhsaasahh,chea hue wuchnum neh kenh
    (oh my homea thousand homes go as your sacrifice,i wish to be just with you for ever,i travelled thousands of miles but found nothing like you)
    thankx again dear.

  6. indeed Adfar to have a home of your own,especially in big cities is a big deal.it is really a touching story.

  7. Truly very touchy.Your home and family are your nest, the center of your life, the hub from which all your daily experiences extend. Both as children and adults, our home and family are where we feel most comfortable in the world, far removed from the dangers and distractions of the world outside. They determine how you make your life decisions; they shape your attitudes, your awareness, your self-esteem. A healthy home life is obviously a vital ingredient in the pursuit of a meaningful life.

  8. thank you dear.

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